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Monday, August 07, 2006 

About rugby and cooking... to being me.

I guess I owe a follow-up post after announcing that [S] and I will be attending cooking classes from Saturday onwards. It is not quite how I envisioned spending my precious leisure time on a Saturday, but I guess there is a first for everything. First things first… The Amabokoboko (the South African rugby team) lost (20-18) the all–important tri-nations game against the Aussies in Sydney. It was a major disappointment… politely put. Not even the alcohol and the cold weather could numb the gut-wrenching pain! Not that I expected us to win an away game, but then, one can always hope and pray for the impossible. I was however quite surprised at how well we played and I will be bold enough to say that we SHOULD HAVE won that game. Yeah, you bloody heard me! The scoreboard may tell a different story, but on the day, South Africa was the better side and the Aussies... well, they were just plain lucky. There, I said it… chapter closed. Ok… let’s get back to Cooking for Fools 101. Saturday’s lesson was an introduction about how the course will be run, the various cooking utensils one would find in the kitchen and how to use them. Apart from blatantly obvious such as, a knife is used for cutting, it really helps to use the right tool for the right job, if you know what I mean. I also realized that most utensils used in the kitchen are really really SHARP, and that I could do serious damage to my body parts or even lose a few… yikes!! Let’s just say the phrase, “put your cock on the block” has new meaning to me. We also learnt about the different cuts of meat (who knew!), different vegetables and their uses (who knew an onion could be so versatile?) and the nuances and flavors various spices add to dishes. (I’ve got my eye on you coriander… you sexy thing, you!) Two people share a prep and cook area and there are 24 people to the class, mostly trendy singles and young (newlywed) couples. No surprises here. We eat what we cook, share a glass of wine, have a few laughs and take home whatever is left over. Aprons, recipes and ingredients are provided by the establishment, which seems reasonable, given the amount of dosh we fork out. At the start of the first class we were each given the opportunity to introduce ourselves with a short bit about what we hope to achieve and why we are doing the classes. It was pretty lame really, as most, if not all of us are there because we are complete and utter doofusses in the kitchen. What do they expect us to say other than the bog-standard “improve my cooking kills”, “learn something new” and “I can’t frikkin cook”? When my turn came around, I was all set to go with the “I-am-a-disaster-in-the-kitchen” scenario, when the comments made by my dear friends’ (Jarvenpa, IITQ and Blackcrag) came to mind. (Thanks guys! Or perhaps I was still drunk from the alcohol I consumed during the game… who knows?) “The truth is”, I said, “I am really just here for the sex. I’ve been told that women find a man who can cook irresistible and I am hoping to impress the opposite sex and get laid more often… many times over. It is not that I am not getting any, I just want to up my quota” (I warned you before… I have no shame!) The room went silent. [S] gasped audibly and then kicked me on the shin. She’s been with me long enough to know that I was taking the piss out of everyone in the room. The singles at the back and on the left of us giggled and then started laughing. They may loathe to admit it, but they are all here for the same reason…. to get their freak on. There’s no fooling me, mister… I know you! The chef, God bless his chubby chocolate filled heart, caught on to my sense of humour. He promised that I would definitely be a hit with the ladies…. that is, if my girlfriend would allow it. Yep, cooking classes beat internet dating… anytime.

Chitty, you are the MAN! LOL

Chitty your chins must just be black n blue ... poor baby!

Thank heaven for guys like you ... can't wait to see what your "freak" cooks up. *wink*

Smooch,
The Tart
; )

Good man! I'd love to do a cooking class of some sorts, maybe this is the inspiration I need.

Katt: For what it's worth... I try!
Tart: Ha. My shins kind of are... she kicks me a lot... although I may deserve it.
Pienk Zuit: Go for it. Men need all the tools they can lay there hands on these days.

Maksideem: Thanks for the compliment. Will stop by your blog later. :)

Well, my dear mama always said honesty was the best policy.
She didn't clue me in to whether it helped her have compassion on guys, though.

I love the boldness of your statement. So often people are all trying to say the right and proper and boring thing--how great to have someone say what everyone was secretly thinking. Good move!

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