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Tuesday, July 26, 2005 

Into the lion's den

I haven’t been blogging since last Thursday. I wish I can say I had been busy, but that would not be entirely true. I have had a lot on my mind and I hope that what I am about to do will put an end to the uncertainty and turmoil. Change is good right? At least that is what I’ve been told. It is easy to make change. Change happens all the time. Even if you sit still and do nothing, the world around you is in constant motion. It is however difficult to make good change. Change that makes one’s life better. Change that endures. Change that persists. I believe that in order to make a good change one firstly needs to be in control of that change. I have come to the decision that I need to leave the company I am working for and find myself another job. It is a realization that has been with me for a while now. After having been here for only one year, I can say with certainty that I am not happy with where I am. I feel caged in. The job is no longer a challenge and I know that I am capable of doing so much more than what I am currently doing. I constantly feel like I do not belong, as if I am sitting on the sidelines and watching what happens in the office from a distance. The people I work with are great… wacky and weird, but great nonetheless. I love the energy and the passion they have for their jobs and since I do not feel the same way about mine it is unfair on them to go on with the make belief. So today I am going to walk into my boss’s office and tell him that I intend leaving the company at the end of this year. As I have nothing definite lined up, I need the time until then to complete my current project load, find a new job and get my plans in order. Telling him what my intentions are may not be the wise thing to do, but I hate sneaking around and pretending that all is good when in fact it is not. I trust that he will be open-minded and see that my intentions are good because if he isn’t, I may be out of a job sooner than I had anticipated. The six months hand-over/notice period I am proposing may not fit in with the company’s plans. Wish me luck! I may get more than what I bargained for. Be that as it may… there is no looking back and I am moving forward from here. Update (11:54 AM): It went as well as can be expected. No boss is happy when one of his managers resigns and he felt that the company had failed me in some aspects. Now how nice is that... huh?! I guess it is easier to accept that someone is leaving for another job with better prospects, more money, etc than when they leave because they feel they have to. There was the obligatory, “Is there anything we do or change to make you stay”, but we both knew that the company was not going to live up to my expectations and needs. Good news is that he is ok with me staying on. It has to be cleared at board level, but he doesn’t foresee any major hiccups. Downside(?) is I get to interview, select and appoint my own successor. I will hand over my current project load to one of the other guys on my level. I will be re-assigned to work on special projects. Haha... special projects my ass! I almost burst out laughing when he said that. Anyone with half a brain cell knows that assigning someone to special projects is just a way of keeping them away from the daily running of the business and ensures that they are not involved in any strategic/key business issues or projects. I’m not complaining. It suits me fine for now… it will give me more time to find that perfect job. I may even have more time to blog. All in all, I think it went rather well for me. The office grapevine is already abuzz with the news of my resignation. The next few months at the office is going to be a whole lotta fun. 6 months is more than enough time to achieve immortality and ensure that they will talk about me for years to come. Any good ideas? .


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