Riding the Slipstream

I have a brand new pet peeve. I detest people who ask me, “So… how’s the new year going?” I don’t know how the new year is going. The new year is only FOUR weeks old and although the first pay-day is upon us, I suppose it is going like any other year…. SLOWLY and one day at a time. I’m still broke from spending all that money over the holidays. My credit card looks like it fought in the Battle of Hastings and I already need another holiday. The problems of the old year followed me into the new year and I have yet to come up with a plan on how to rid myself of them permanently. Why would people even ask you a question like this? If the new year were a relationship, we’d still be in the getting-to-know-you phase. We would be bonding, falling in love and spending all our free time together. Our hearts will be filled with anticipation. And even though we may have progressed to the bedroom, I’d still be getting a boner every time I think of her. So please don’t ask me how the new year is going? Ask me a few months from now and I promise to give you an answer. I only need to get past the getting-to-know-you phase and as soon as 2006 and I become a couple, I’ll tell you. I’ll even throw in a boner for good measure. A simple, “How are you?” will do for now.